The Adventure of Ammy World

As someone who didn’t have a super exciting junior career, I wasn’t super upset about aging out and becoming an amateur. I realized that when I wasn’t the 3 foot equitation star of the Northeast at the age of 16, that I probably wasn’t making it to the 3’6”; the only thing I really cared about in my junior riding days. Now 4 years removed from my junior riding career, I can say that I’ve done a lot more in these 4 years than I did all my years showing as a junior. I’m not sure if it’s because I finally was good enough, or that my parents finally realized this wasn’t something I was going to stop doing once I was in college. To some this is truly the end of an era, and they are no longer the hot junior rider commodity so sought after as working students or clients. They are indeed “just an amateur” after all.

So to all those entering Ammy World, welcome! Here are some things you have to look forward too…

Telling friends you are now an amateur rider… which to non-horsey people sounds like you are just not that good, when in reality you’re pretty decent.

Going to enter into the Children’s Hunter and realizing you can’t…

Writing down your show age on your entries and actually getting emotional and irritated.

Your mom suggesting you make all your junior show ribbons into a quilt, as if you are so far removed from them that they don’t even serve a purpose hanging on the walls.

When people ask why you’re not showing in the equitation anymore and you say you aged out and they say “sorry” back…

Realizing you still have time left to do the USET, but with what horse, and money, and talent…

You’re not in high school anymore so now you have time to ride more and be even better! No just kidding, you have the real world, like college, and a job, and you need to start thinking about your future and how you’re going to afford to do this.

When you have to enter the adult hunter division and compete against the woman with 3 kids, a BMW, and an actual life. What is that? I’m still eating Velveeta mac and cheese and Instagram stalking my crush from 10^th grade.

 

So to all those diving into the adventures of Ammy World…tread lightly and enjoy!

Summer Series Reserve Champion in the Adult Equitation with “Sky”

How to Prevent Making Your Bad Day into Someone Else’s

“Misery loves company, but does company love misery?” – definitely not. Have you ever been having a great day and then a certain someone comes along and knocks you down a bit? Or your day is just plain and mediocre and then here comes a dark cloud disguised as your roommate, teammate, or family member.
To be able dodge these storms is quite difficult. Hence why I’m not writing about how to fight back when someone is dragging you down- frankly because it’s extremely hard and I have not yet mastered that talent. However if any of you readers have, feel free to comment with you own how to guide!!!

Instead, I have picked my own brain about how to perhaps prevent yourself from becoming the storm that makes a dark day for someone else. We all face rough days, and it’s not so much the obstacles we encounter, but how we face them that really can turn a situation around.

1. Use “I” – I statements are an old trick of the trade to communicate with people. “You” can sound accusatory and immediately puts the person you’re talking to on the defense. For example, the other week I was in an alumni flat class with 9 total riders. The flat class after mine, had only 5 or 6. I was disappointed that I ended up being in the bigger flat class, frankly because I had more people to beat out.

I could have said “You did better than me because you were in a smaller class”

What that says about me “I wish I had less people to compete against”

The unintentional message I send out “You wouldn’t have done as well if you were in the bigger class”

Instead using an I message “I’m glad I got to experience a bigger flat class, that will prepare me for regionals, zones, and nationals which will be big classes”

This is a positive self-talk statement that ultimately makes me feel better without making someone else feel worse.

2. Me time – after having refusals during my first show as an intermediate rider, I had a perfect course until I jumped the last incorrect jump during my second show in intermediate over fences. As happy as I was about my ride, making a stupid mistake and blowing the class made me LIVID. So I excused myself to the stands, pouted, put my headphones in, called my dad and cried (yes openly cried) and then rejoined my team at the rail to support the novice riders. It’s ok to throw yourself a small pity party when you’re upset. Take the time you need to breathe and remember the world is still spinning. I’d rather take the few minutes to reorganize and get back on track then lash out on the people around me. Making others feel bad about themselves will ultimately make you feel even worse.

3. Get back on track – when you feel like crap, having happy people around you almost makes your skin crawl. Sometimes we feel people are being especially happy or smiley because we are feeling down and out. It’s easy to try to get people down to your level just so that you don’t have this positivity trying to ruin the pity party you have determined to throw for yourself for the rest of the day. Instead, try to force yourself to smile and laugh, chances are you will accidentally slip up and smile and laugh for real. Try to suck up the positive energy around you once you’ve taken the time you needed to cry, pout, and curse the universe. Me? Curse that bending line.

4. Laugh at yourself- I had a friend in my lesson ask me to send her some videos I took of her riding. She had a rough time to start our lesson with some bad stops and some good saves on her part to stay in the saddle. She wanted the videos for a “fail Friday”. Sometimes when literally everything goes wrong, you just need to find the humor in the situation. The expression “I’m laughing so I don’t cry”. I posted the video of me going off course at the last fence although I was mortified and embarrassed frankly because it’s happened to everyone. Everyone has been popped over a fence, took a launcher, lost their stirrup, or just “forgot how to equitate”. You’ll end up hearing so many fail stories, yours may turn out to be not so bad…or you’ll have the best fail of everyone and that’s cool?

5. Apologize – if all else fails and you do develop into a storm that rains down on every person in your path, it’s never too late to apologize. My roommate was also my best friend, teammate, and fellow E-board member. Some shows she would get the brunt of my frustration, stress, and anger. I would lash out and she did not deserve an ounce of it! So as stubborn as I am, I would apologize and tell her how I was feeling and why I was frankly being the worse human in a 5 mile radius. Sometimes apologies don’t fix everything, but people acknowledge when you admit to being wrong or unjustified. You say things you don’t mean. Sometimes I felt like I literally blacked out and a demon took over!! Don’t have your last conversation with someone be you putting them down; have it be you lifting yourself up. You know you are better than how you’ve acted and you’re sorry that they had to deal with a person that frankly isn’t you!

I have learned that a lot of lessons I’ve learned through riding apply to “regular life”. I’m not a perfect person, and don’t always practice what I preach, but sometimes just having these tips out in front of my face in black and white is the perfect reminder of the person I’m always trying to continue to be.

Mind Your P’s and Q’s and Thank Yous

This year as I filled out my IHSA alumni form, I was asked to write down the level of riding I finished at as an undergrad. Freshman year, I remember filling out a placement form trying my best to be as honest as possible and was placed in Novice Flat and Novice Fences. On my alumni form I filled in that I achieved a level of Open Fences and Intermediate Flat. A big part of me felt that although I was being honest and technically correct, I wish there was a drop down box where I could explain what happened a year ago. About a year ago, after competing twice in Open Fences, I was determined too inexperienced to be allowed to continue in competition by show stewards, comprised of 2-3 coaches from my region. The news was devastating and embarrassing as a senior and the captain of the riding team. I felt like I worked 4 years to finally be an Open Rider and team captain…and in one weekend I felt both had been taken from me.

Fast forward a year and a lot happened. In the few months that followed this incident I started a blog, got a lot of support and love from friends, old riding pals, and complete strangers. I got some hateful comments and definitely drew attention; some good and some not so good. I got a valuable lesson in the strength and dangers of social media, that getting emotional and defensive is only human, and that the words you choose define how people view you.

For anyone who has not seen my previous posts, feel free to scroll back from where they all started a year ago. My goal was to originally have the decision about my eligibility be over-turned. When that didn’t work, I saw to have the rule that allowed this to happen be clarified in the rule book. I then turned to myself and put myself into equestrian boot camp, doing all I could in the saddle and in the gym to get myself to a point where I would be able to prove I could ride in the Open division.

I was not re-evaluated at any time to re-instate my eligibility to ride in Open Fences despite my request and all the work I had put in. After not showing over fences since November 2014, I competed at regionals in March at Skidmore College and placed 3^rd overall in Intermediate Over Fences.

However, I do not want this blog post to be about how I ride alumni now in a new region and I’m so happy and doing great – even if that is true.

Instead I have only 2 words I want to write about: Thank You

1. Thank you to my teammates. Riding for the UAlbany equestrian team was by far one of the best decisions I ever made. I was extremely intimidated coming in as a freshman to a college team, and I have never felt so immediately loved and welcomed. I still am very thankful for the upperclassman that put me under their wings. I am equally grateful to the amazing group of ladies that have now taken over the team. I knew the group of girls I left in May would flourish and continue to support one another. They really helped me keep my head during all the craziness and without even knowing me all too well, stood at my defensive without a second thought.
2. Thank you to my non-horsey friends. I appreciate all the “I heard about that horse thing” messages and phone calls and passing chats. Although not everyone understands the horse world, everyone can relate to being told they aren’t good enough. It’s not a good feeling. So to all my friends who told me I was more than good enough, your reminders really helped.
3. Thank you to my coaches Beth and Dina. This happened all of 3 months after Beth and Dina took on the team. Despite juggling a new team, a barn of horses, and a crazy schedule – you both managed to put in the extra time to prep me for competition. Thank you for all the phone calls you made on my behalf, sticking your necks out for me, and kicking my butt in the saddle.

Thank You- Two very simple words that we don’t say enough to each other and almost never to ourselves.

I have learned in the past year I need to start thanking myself.

For juggling all that life throws at you. Thank your parents, your friends, your significant other for supporting you and giving you the love and encouragement you need to get through life’s twists and turns. But you wake up in the morning, even if you snooze for 17 minutes, and get your butt to work on time. You drive yourself to the gym and put in a good work out even after working 9-6. You take your own stirrups away because it’s No Stirrup November and you know you desperately need to work on your lower leg. You choose the grilled check and veggies even though you want Panera mac and cheese despite how over-priced it is. You skip out on drinks with your friends because you need that money to put gas in your car, to get to work, to make money, to put gas in your car.

There are so many things we do for ourselves, amazing things we do for ourselves, and we never tell ourselves thank you. Thanks for doing your hair today, you’re killin’ it. Thanks for not crying because you’re so stressed – way to be strong. Thanks for splurging and getting over-priced coffee this morning. Thanks for remembering to put your laundry away – mom was about to flip.

I never think twice when I thank a server for my food, a professor for their time, my mom for leaving me a plate of food for dinner after a long day. But when it comes to me, I a lot of the time criticize myself for what I don’t do.

Wow, thanks for eating 8 Chips Ahoy cookies, that’s going to look great in your riding pants tomorrow. Thanks for trying to pull off the inside turn and instead burying myself into the oxer and losing the class. Thanks for having dried pimple cream on your face as you buy froyo behind some person who went to your high school and is clearly confused on why you look “like that”.

In life, just like in riding, we need to celebrate our successes and improve everywhere else. We have the power to never let failure happen. We can find success in everything we do, even if it’s not exactly how we pictured it.

So go out there and paint your own picture.

Thanking myself today and every day.

Don’t Let Anyone Rent Space in Your Life, Unless They Are a Good Tenant

You can’t take money to the grave. You probably won’t remember the nights you stayed in the re-watch your favorite TV series… for the third time. And you definitely won’t remember that one time you totally flunked the first Organic Chemistry test you thought you aced because you finished the whole 40 question test in 27 minutes.

The people in your life make a HUGE impact on you whether you like it or not. Whether it’s a teacher or an uncle, your mom or your grade school best friend, you’re altered for good and for bad. Sometimes you don’t even realize they made any type of imprint on you until years later when you’re 4 weeks from graduating college and it’s almost midnight and you ate a plain half a bagel for dinner at 9:30 PM.

They always say your best friends are like a good trusty bras: there for support, to lift you up, and are always close to your heart. They also say they are hard to find. But for me, I have been so lucky and fortunate to have had some guiding force leading me to some truly incredible people. As selfish as it sounds, I feel like some people were put on this earth for me. I value them that much. I always say you should be able to depend on others as much as you depend on yourself. I hope that the people I surround myself with support me as much as I am a support system for myself. Sometimes you do have to ride solo and do things on your own, but it’s nice to know you have a safety net when things get tough.

A lot of the times, some people often have so much to deal with in their lives that they can’t spend the time to lift others up. How can you possibly help lift someone else up when you are sinking yourself? At first you can be angry and upset having someone in your life who does wrong to you. It’s like having your “swimmies” pop while you’re in the deep end.

Really?! You had to fail on me now?? I didn’t need you in the shallow end, but now you crap out in the deepest part of the pool?!

But maybe your “swimmies” have been poked and prodded and are kinda beat up themselves? They could barely hold it together on their own, but with your weight they completely crashed. Can you really blame them?

I guess the huge analogy here is most people in your life, though significant and influential, are not permanent. Sometimes however, people are not in the right time in their life to “rent space” in YOUR life. Something has gone haywire, a previously “good tenant” is now punching holes in the wall, breaking the furniture, and not paying their rent. It’s okay to evict those people who have not respected “your space”.

However, people are allowed to mess up. They can go from someone who was punching holes in their walls to the person who pays their rent early – we all can make that transition. I guess it’s up to you to make the decision to allow them to sign a “new lease” regardless of their previous history.

If I’ve learned anything, it’s to surround yourself with people who love you and support you. Those are the things you’ll remember. You’ll remember when you came home to Ben and Jerry’s Half Baked ice cream when you texted your roommate crying in the elevator that you flunked your first Organic Chemistry test you thought you aced. You’ll remember being physically dragged out to celebrate your 20th birthday and having a blast. And you’ll remember that time you were lifted up so high from such a deep place, you knew you could continue on the path all by yourself.

Surround yourself with those types of people. Even if they let you down sometimes. It’s ok to be upset and angry when they let you down. What’s not ok, is to blame yourself for the wrong things people do to you. Life is always about the circumstances you are put in and how you deal with them.

People who let you down… they need the support now. They need to be lifted back up to a place where they can be an equal partner in a friendship. And if they are not there, don’t let them rent the space in your life until they are ready and you are ready. And if they don’t fit into a niche in your life, they will fit somewhere else. That is a fact of life that everyone can be content with. There’s a place for everyone to stay in this life. Just make sure you’re renting space to the right people, even if it takes a little longer for you to hand over the contract.

❤ 

Accept the things you cannot change; Change the things you cannot accept

I have taken a lot of pride in being able to articulate how I’ve felt over the last several months. I will do my best to chose the right words to express how I feel today – but forgive me as I am almost rendered speechless after today’s events.

Back November, I placed 3rd at Hartwick College moving me into Open Fences and qualifying me for Zone 2 Regionals in Intermediate Fences. I competed twice in open fences in one weekend at Morrisville State College pinning 5th in both. I was then told I was deemed unsuitable to ride in Open Fences. This decision stood firmly and was no re-evaluated come spring semester.

Accepting what I could not change:

After being bitter, angry, embarrassed, outraged, and mortified I had to accept that the decision made for me, to not be able to compete in Open Fences. I had to accept that there are going to be times in life where nothing you say or do will change someone’s opinion. I had to accept that no amount of dedication, experience, or support could reverse the fact that I was not to compete in Open Fences.

I could not change the words I chose to express my discontent. I could not change the initial anger I felt and that I let my emotions get the best of me. I could not change the slight chip I took on Pompi on Saturday and the long spot I took on Santos on Sunday.

I could not change the feeling of having a target painted on my back. I could not change the staring eyes and the pressure I felt to perform today. I could not change the feeling that if I made a mistake today, all the negative attention surrounding me would be validated.

These are the things I was able to finally accept because I could not change them.

Changing what I could not accept:

I changed how I looked at my situation. Instead of it being the kiss of death to my IHSA career, it was the kick in the butt I needed to get myself into the best riding shape of my life. I turned my head away from the negativity, and instead towards the positivity of my family, friends, team, fellow riders, and complete strangers who reached out to me via facebook, twitter, e-mail, and this blog.

I changed how I saw myself. When I pointed into Open, I saw myself as being a place holder for the bottom spots. I wanted to be on the top. I wasn’t going to settle for anything less.

I changed my worth ethic and kicked it into overdrive. With the help of my trainer at home and my coaches at school, I took every ride as an open opportunity to prove to myself why I deserved success and to honor the commitment I made to myself.

I could not accept being average. I could not accept being the girl “banned” from Open Fences.

So today I stepped into the ring – my first time competing at Skidmore over fences this year – having not jumped in a show since November, with lucky bracelets and a prayer. I just hoped and prayed that I would not crumbled under the massive weight that was placed on my shoulders so many, many weeks ago. Months of anxiety and picturing every worse case scenario had to be packaged up and sealed away as I entered the ring.

Throughout this journey  I’ve had so much support. I won’t even attempt to put into words the value and impact that has had on me – it simply cannot be done. Although I walked into the ring alone today, I felt as if my army was along for the ride.

Today I pinned 3rd in Intermediate Over Fences in the company of 14 talented riders.

Today I felt the weight of this whole ordeal be lifted off my shoulders and I finally stepped out of the confinement of my own self-doubt.

Today I felt empowered, supported, relieved and free.

The whole point of this blog was to follow my journey to prove myself as an Open Rider. I don’t think pinning 1st, 3rd, or 8th would have proved anything now.

I think I have shown myself that possibilities are endless in this life. I think I have seen how powerful a positive attitude is. I think I have realized how important it is to be persistent and never give up, despite all the forces telling you to do so.

I may never have the opportunity to prove myself as an Open Rider, this is something I have finally accepted.

I think I have just proven today that goals are attainable. You can block out the negativity in your life and only call upon it as a source of motivation. You don’t have to just deal with certain things as they are if you are willing to put in the necessary efforts to make things happen FOR YOU instead of letting things happen TO YOU.

Dream Big. Never Give Up. IHSA has been the most rewarding yet stressful experience of my life. My riding career is far from over, although this new chapter has still yet to be drafted. I am so fortunate to have learned so much from IHSA, my coaches, my teammates, and my fellow riders. I will always be so thankful for the opportunities I was given.

Thank you to everyone who followed my journey.

It’s been a wild ride 😉 

Never Place a Period Where a Comma Should Go

A lot of times people are too quick to assume “that’s it” in life. You failed your driver’s test so that’s it, you’re doomed to a life of public transportation. Your boyfriend of 8 months breaks your heart and you assume you’re destined for a life of solitude and cats. A lot of things in life are snap shots in time and have no real influence on the next life event or the next minute. I procrastinated as long as possible to find out my fate for this coming horse show on Valentine’s Day. I contemplated just entering myself in Open Fences to see if anyone would take notice. I contemplated not showing at all so I could just say “well I wasn’t showing so I didn’t ask”. It’s a lot easier to avoid things that you expect to be unpleasant. However, I decided to come out and just ask if my suitability for Open Fences would be reconsidered. After working hard all winter and kicking my training into overdrive, I was hopeful but not certain of my fate. If anything I thought perhaps I wouldn’t be allowed to do Open at Skidmore, but maybe Morrisville or Hartwick. Unfortunately I was informed that my situation would not be re-evaluated and I would continue to not be allowed to compete in Open Fences. Naturally, I was heart broken. Part of me knew this was a possibility, but it felt much different knowing it was my new reality. I felt so confident and well trained going into this semester that I was hoping I would get a second change to prove myself – either in competition, or in practice. I really think I’ve come leaps and bounds since November, and I was excited to put it all into practice. As discouraged as I am, I will continue to practice and work hard and compete on the flat. I’m not sure what the next steps are for me as far as my IHSA career is concerned, but I will continue to keep my goals in mind and to keep my chin up. I may not be competing in Open Fences this coming Saturday, but I will continue to have the same positive mentality. 

Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke – Equestrian Community Public Forums

A couple long months ago I used the term “bully” in my blog post. I admitted then and again now that my definition of bully was clouded with emotion and pain from criticism I had received in an area that is extremely important in my life. Just like a teacher can mark you wrong for bubbling in answer “A” instead of “C”, a professional can tell you when you heels have crept up, when you’ve caught the horse in the mouth, etc. I felt singled out and hurt much like the feeling of being bullied… but the criticism I received was intended not for this purpose. Not to make me feel embarrassed, hurt, or to shake my confidence – although it effectively did just that. The feedback I received was intended to keep myself and our valued Zone 2 IHSA open horses happy and safe. Although I still believe the decision made on my behalf was done a little prematurely, I have to believe that it was not done from a place of intended injury. Not all people find themselves in as fortunate of a situation as myself…

I had taken a hiatus from blogging 1. because I had lost steam from my post that went “viral” increasing my view volume by 17,000+ and 2. because I was returning to my crazy hectic life as a second semester senior with important roles in two very demanding organizations + being extremely ill with the self-diagnosed plague (dramatic). However, a recent issue has come to my attention that couldn’t wait a moment longer as I write this from the upstairs silent floor at one of my school’s 3 libraries. I admit that the blog post that set the wheels in motion, was not intended for any such purpose other than to express my thoughts on a topic. I am hopeful that this blog post will do the same. I wanted to promote my situation to get advice, insight and support. I’ve received so much unexpected love and support in the last several months, I feel it’s necessary to pay it forward.

Junior Rider News – Facebook group description

Junior Rider News is a group created by junior horseback riders for junior riders. It is a place to post your latest result, photos and videos of your latest competitions.

It is also a place to post product reviews and training accomplishments. If you tried a new pair of riding gloves, tell us about it. If you finally got your horse to jump that liverpool, tell us how.

It is also a place for sponsors and college recruiters to find young talent to endorse.

We also hope to offer prizes and a year end all around rider award!

But most of all it is a place for young riders to visit, post to and enjoy!

I joined this group although I am not a junior rider (anymore) because a friend of mine shared with me that a member of the group shared my blog post here. Curiosity to view the post motivated me to join the group. Mainly the group is of people posting questions about equipment or horses, posting accomplishments and transformations, or just to meet people of similar interests. The description is super positive and most of the posts are harmless horse fun.

It’s certain posts however, that don’t seem so playful. There’s a way to express your opinion and there’s a way to put someone down… to make them feel inferior. Unfortunately I feel like riding in a way is almost designed to try to get you down… sometimes

In this sport you are judged… You are judged by your peers, by your coaches, and by the judges (the only people have really should have this power). You pay thousands of dollars for people to tell you you are a 1st place winner, or you’re not. No one would rather be in 2nd than in 1st. If that’s the case… let me know… I want to be in every one of your classes.

Even when you are not competing you are judged. Why are you using sports medicine boots, eskadron boots are much better! Or you didn’t pack your horses feet after you jumped?! How about why would you want to ride in look a like parlanti boots?! Or the you are only showing in the 3′ and you’re how old? –> These are just a few things I’ve heard personally. To be honest, these statements above have bothered me at some point in my life. At the age of 21, I have DEFINITELY become a lot tougher about any and all things, including criticism or just statements that have no merit. It doesn’t mean I don’t think about them or that they didn’t bother me…

After all my time blogging, I’ve only received a handful of negative comments. Some of them I’m assuming coming from people who see my situation VASTLY different than how I see it. Just like I hope people respect my perspective, I respect that people have their own view points and I can’t fault them for that.

A most recent situation that stemmed from Junior Rider News and then onto other media sites primarily Facebook and Twitter has captured my attention. Jackie Debus, a long islander rider, posted a photo of herself jumping on a post “What’s the highest you’ve jumped?” as a comment on JRN. Her post was obviously being read on a phone and was screen-shotted and uploaded to a decently well known anon twitter account with a comment questioning the legitimacy in the height of the jump.

The post reads “usually I ignore posts where the height someone claims a jump is doesn’t seem right… But this one I couldn’t even” – I’m not even exactly sure what the height of the jump is in my defense. Some times I go to horse shows where the jump is in front of my nose and I question if it’s true to height. Especially when you are evaluating a jump from  a photo, there are lots of variables that are unknown between the angle of the shot, the height of the standard… the list continues. 

This is not the first time people have been “called out” in photos. A similar incidence happened a few years back where a Facebook user was using pictures of different bay horses jumping and claiming them to be all the same horse and all HER horse – both untrue statements. Another user used photos of another user jumping at a competition, and claimed them to be herself. Another twitter user claimed a photo to be her new jumper – Sapphire MCLAIN WARD’s horse – which was almost comical…

Unfortunately for Jackie, all social media sights are public forums. And there are a lot of online equestrian forums too that are all public. Once you put something on the internet, it’s fair game to all. That being said, I wouldn’t appreciate someone using my photo or words without my permission, but there’s not much you can do about it. I would admit that I don’t usually ask people if I can release a photo of them on my blog if they are mentioned. I usually know the person well enough to find a flattering photo of them on their facebook. I really only ask permission to quote people – which I asked Jackie prior to writing this article. I attempted to reach out to the twitter account “ShitTrainersSay” – but was unable to message them via Twitter because they were not following my account.

I have seen countless screenshots of conversations back and forth between Jackie and this anon, and the anon and other anons, and Jackie and people on facebook…

I’m not going to give “My Take On the Situation” in this blog. I have a lot of views on the things that pertain to me and I’m not going to pretend that this is one of those things. However I did want to bring to light what social media and online forums can do…

Language is an expressive medium. Between tone and inflection and gestures we can say much more than just what we are saying. However, written language like you see on your computer screen has its faults. It’s extremely difficult to convey mood and tone over written words. A talented few authors can do it, but those aren’t usually the people on twitter and facebook and online forums. To play devil’s advocate I am always the first to say “they didn’t mean it like that”. Then again, sometimes you can EASILY read between the lines.

My hope to all Anon accounts, and to everyone using public media is that everyone chooses their words with the upmost care and to understand that as hard as you try, you may be misunderstood. I would hope that people would stop and think “what would i say if that was posted about me” just to put yourself in the shoes of the receiving end.

I am sorry not to be able to give a more one-sided opinion on the situation and I am definitely not one to play Switzerland. But after seeing all the posts (and being exhausted by the sarcasm) I really am at a loss. My only hope is that eventually social media and public forums will just stick to their purposes – connecting people positively instead of negatively. I have met and interacted with so many great people because of it, so I would  encourage anyone in a similar situation like Jackie and the anon ShitTrainersSay to just shake it off and chalk it up to the few pits that online media has to offer.

As far as the photo goes – again I really couldn’t tell you what the “true height” is. And everyone has their own opinions. As far as messaging someone to take a photo down of you – I say to kill the person with kindness to get what you want is probably a great strategy. Being on the defensive will only get you so far, but maybe you have every right to be defensive! Twitter conversations are viewable to the public. The word psycho is strong and the word bully is stronger. Everyone has their own perspective – disagree with it sure, but disrespecting it is another thing entirely. We get most upset about the things that mean a lot to us. Jumping 4’3″ or 2’6″ on a horse you trained yourself, or a school master maybe the greatest accomplishment you’ve had to date – having someone chip away at that isn’t a great feeling –> but that accomplishment is for you and no one else…

I’m happy to be over the plague and back on my writing grind! Stay tuned, don’t think I’ve forgotten I am scheduled to horse show in 10 days!

Champagne Taste On A Beer Budget

For all the many people who engage in equestrian sports, only a small majority make profit off of their mounts. Some just break even, or earn enough to cover their supplements or maybe shoes for 2-3 months. That being said more times than not us equestrians are shelling out absurd amounts of money on equipment, vet bills, shoes, competition fees, and all the bells and whistles. I have never owned a horse but I’ve had to pay my fair share of emergency vet calls, board, shoes, and horse shows. I try to cut corners where I can being a college student with no source of serious income besides seasonal jobs, random weeks helping out at the barn, and some EMT related odd jobs here and there. My true financial stability comes from an extremely reliable source my dad has so cleverly named “The Bank Of Dad”.

I am extremely hopeful to have a well paying job after graduating PA school (hopefully) to be able to support my nasty riding habit (kidding, it’s awesome)  completely on my own. I help out of course paying expenses here and there like supplies, braiding, and extra lessons from time to time, but my parents are definitely backing me and have been since I started. My goal in general is to be a successful PA and also flip horses as a side job/hobby. The best of both worlds in my opinion and maybe stumble upon my “forever” horse eventually. I’m so used to having different horses in my life I can’t think of riding 1 horse for more than a year’s time. Such a strange concept to me!

I get myself into serious pickles because I have a CHAMPAGNE TASTE ON A BEER BUDGET. I just happen to gravitate towards more expensive products and horses for that matter. I’m assuming it’s because at certain price points there is a difference in quality of products (and horses) that may be worth it to spend the extra cash on. Here are some things I’ve learned a long the way from SERIOUSLY pinching pennies…

1. It’s nice to spoil your horse with treats from the store, but you are much better off financially buying mints at the drug store. They usually sell them in a bag for a $1 so you can get two bags and spoil your horse rotten. Also some grocery stores sell discounted apples that have began to turn that are completely fine for horses! Or even better, buy ingredients and make your own horse treats!

2. Pack a cooler for horse shows. Food trucks have a tendency to be unhealthy and overpriced. Pack water, snacks and food. Some horse show days I barely have time to sit down and have lunch, but at least I’m saving some money. Especially when I’m showing a lot in the summer, having the cooler with water bottles is a life saver and you don’t have to wait in line for food. At HITS this past summer I brought food for breakfast and lunches for the 3 days I was there. I saved probably $20-30 by doing that alone.

3. When it comes to horses you need to pick 3 things you’re really set on. Usually horses that are a little young and green are the lowest in cost. An older horse may also be on the lower price end. When I was looking for a horse, I knew I could not afford a “packer” or proven winner. Just because a horse has won this competition or has this bloodline – doesn’t necessarily make it the right horse for you OR the winning horse either. I ended up with an older horse who came from an auction with no known show experience and she ended up being one of the greatest horses I’ve had!! If you are looking for horses on a limited budget, they are out there, but it will take some time to find them. Make sure if you take on a younger green horse that you have the patience and skill to bring them along. If you’re opting for an older horse, understand that they may need more maintenance and attention to stay competition ready. It’s a lot to think about, but this is an investment and should be taken as so!

4.  Vegetable oil works just as good as leather oil.. not kidding. Google it

5. Used saddles: are great! Breaking in a saddle is hard work and is slightly uncomfortable for a few rides. The great part about a used saddle is that it’s already broken in so you KNOW this is how the saddle will always feel. Once a new saddle is broken in, it may feel differently. If you’re still growing or planning to sell your horse I wouldn’t suggest to get a custom saddle right away unless you can re-sell or trade it in. If you have a limited budget stick with the lesser priced saddles and what you like and what’s comfortable for you and your horse. I would highly suggest trying the saddle out first if possible. Don’t worry so much about brand names. If it works for you, who cares! Just remember this is one piece of equipment you and your horse share EVERYDAY. I would invest more in my mattress because I sleep in it every night and my sleep is critical for my performance. Same with a saddle. You will be in that saddle for an absurd amount of hours in it’s lifetime. Take good care of it and it will look great and last years and years! Make sure you and your horse are comfortable so your jointed performance won’t be hindered. – look for saddles for a CHAMPAGNE TASTE ON A BEER BUDGET at http://www.highendusedsaddles.com/  

The list could go on and on forever. It’s hard to not get all caught up in it. I felt myself this week wanting an Antares saddle after riding in 2 of them repeatedly this week. I own a very nice pessoa saddle that fits me and most horses I get on. As much as I’d love a new saddle, this sport has taught me to pick and choose because all of a sudden you will NEED something. A boot busts, your horse makes some vents (holes) in their heavy turnout blankets (destructive things they are), and suddenly you wish you had that extra money you just splurged to buy a 3rd monogrammed show shirt.

I will not go as far to say I have never bought any equine related equipment/apparel I didn’t necessarily need, but I do my best to spread my dollars so I can give my horse and myself what we both need to be successful! A 5,000 saddle and 60,000 horse won’t always win you the blue ribbon (I say always because sometimes this does happen by chance), but it’s hard to compete with a bicycle helmet and a horse with only a left lead canter…

So be thankful for what you do have and make the most out of your own personal riding situation…. and keep playing lotto.. ya never know 😉

No Days Off

Just not feeling it today? It’s rainy and cold and tossed and you turned all night? You’d rather just hang out in your PJs and binge watch Netflix. Sounds amazing!! Soccer cleats can lay in your closet without a care in the world. Your piano can take a day off. And well you went to the gym 2 days in a row so do you really need to go again?

Riding is a NO DAYS OFF sport. When you have a horse, taking a day off or going to AC for an extended weekend isn’t so easy. You have to find someone you trust to ride your horse, tell them what bit to ride in, to be careful passing the back door of the ring, and to actually ride your horse well (but just not better than you). Horses are animals of routine. Hay and grain 6:30. Turnout out 10-1:30 with hay at lunch time. Hay and grain again at 4:30. That routine believe it or not includes their rider. Sometimes routines with horses are bad. If it’s your routine to stop and chat at the gate, your horse is used to stopping at the gate to converse as well. Your routine should be positive and flexible so the horse does not get bored. One day it’s serpentines and the next it’s a course of poles. Imagine if you went into math everyday and learned the same algebra concept. You’d be bored to tears! Instead you take what you learn one day and expand on it the next. That’s progressive learning and makes for a happier rider and horse!

Today was definitely out of my routine – riding 3 horses.

Mia was my first ride of the day. Mia is a extremely beautiful hunter who was a champion of the children’s hunters. After some time off and motherhood, Mia is  back and getting back into shape. She has a trot TO DIE FOR and definitely made me focus on having a good quality trot that was open but not strung out. I rode Mia one time YEARS AND YEARS ago. I felt like at that time Mia was calling the shots and I was along for the ride. Between having a few years under my belt and perhaps Mia’s new found motherly charm – we had a great ride today!

Next was Firefly! Firefly belongs to the barn and is just coming back from an abscess. Lucky for me she can sit for days and days at a time and come out the same horse. She is a tb mare with an amazing trot but is very sensitive. You need to have a soft hand and seat on her or else she becomes extremely agitated. I love riding Firefly because she is quick to tell on me if I’m a little to busy with my hands or in my tack. I’ll have Firefly all to my self a few days at a time when I’m home for short breaks and just feel the itch to sit on something. Longer breaks I usually lease horses but it’s nice to know even on short weekends Firefly is always there willing to go for a nice ride or out in the field. Such a sweet mare and will jump the moon too!

The last ride of the day was Royal again. Izabel, Royal’s owner, helped me the majority of yesterday and today. She was basically telling me what to do, and I was implementing it. She knows Royal so well, she anticipates what he’s going to do before he does it. Izabel is a equitation rider, but also has taken some dressage lessons which definitely aids her in her flatwork. Royal is an AMAZING horse. His trot is TO DIE FOR. Today it took less time for Royal to “get down to business” and respect my aids. When we both were listening to one another and the picture was great!

The amazing thing about Izabel, who has now not been on her horse in 4 months (and counting) is how committed she is. It’s hard to get people to ride their horses in the winter regardless of their situation. Izabel on the other hand is there helping tack her horse, helping me while I’m on his back ,and helping me untack him. Since Izabel can’t be in the saddle, she spends her time watching videos and reading books to try to keep herself mentally in riding mode until she is given the green light to be back in the saddle. Many people would throw themselves a pity party and be pained to see another person on their horse. Although it pains Izabel to not be in the saddle, it would be more painful to completely be without her Royal. You can tell it makes Royal’s day to be spoiled rotten by his almost 17 year old rider who impresses me on the daily with how she handles her tough situation – like someone way beyond her years.

Izabel and I have always had a lot in common. We are both in difficult situations we would rather not be in. I’m sure Izabel would much rather be in my position than her own, but we share the same “when things get tough, get tougher” attitude. Izabel is a very successful rider who will actually be receiving awards this month for the past competition year in the 3′ Equitation as 1st on Long Island in her whole division and 2nd on Long Island in the 3′ PHA class. This is NOT an easy feat especially since she was out of competition for the whole fall! I couldn’t be more happy for her!!

Izabel is a perfect example of what true horsemanship is. Putting your horse above and beyond your own self. I am so happy Izabel is on the road to recovery and is getting stronger everyday.  As much as I love riding Royal, I am excited to be there when she is finally back in action. Thank you Izabel for supporting me and teaching me an extremely valuable lesson.

Also to her mother Janice!!!!! — Janice has been at the barn with Izabel through all of this. What an amazing support for Izabel and for Royal! She is one of the best horse show moms I’ve ever known – Janice has stepped in to help me more times than I can ever thank her for. I know I am just repeating what Izabel is thinking – but your patience and understanding is something that will definitely reserve you a spot with the saints. You understand a lot more of this sport than you give yourself credit for and I know that with you there to help Izabel keep moving forward – there are NO limitations on what can be accomplished.

To all the amazing horse show moms (and dads) out there – us riders and horses thank you a million times over! I am forever grateful!

Well No Days off – more horses tomorrow. 🙂 A routine I never quite get sick of!

Quick Facts

Love this!!! Lots of questions answered! I love riding in college. Couldn’t have made it all this time without it ❤

The Leg Up

By having the right attitude (and learning these four facts!), you can have a successful competitive equestrian career in college! (photo: G. Halkett)

Nearly every conversation I ever have with a high school student who has an interest in riding on an intercollegiate equestrian team includes the same basic information – information that I’ve boiled down into a quick list of the four things that every prospective intercollegiate equestrian needs to know.

The beauty of this list?  It’s short.  It’s straightforward.  It’s basic.

What’s more, the information isn’t limited in its scope; it applies to the Intercollegiate Horse Show Association (IHSA), as well as the NCEA (formerly NCAA) equestrian, the Intercollegiate Dressage Association (IDA), and the American National Riding Commission (ANRC).  It isn’t limited by school either; you can apply these points to every college and university in the United States (and some in…

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